Sunday, October 23, 2016

Saint Elise

[first to the fray, but frail
be cavalier,
don't disengage,
engage
and time will tell,
time has told
that
this is real enough]

Some years ago, I saw you running with some friends,
You were so nonchalant,
you were well on your way,
On your war path, on your way into the night.

And I remember less than I might like,
So come on, let's chase some memories -
Last time, as I recall, we held up all our expectations.

Since seventeen,
I've had every curve and every line memorized;
Every turn, every shape of every surface,
but your face now, it's no surprise.
It's just as I expected.

It was no surprise to find you in all the time apart;
the time apart that stands to serve as a hard
reminder that , to no surprise of my own,
parts of you were unchanged, the only sights
are lights reflected from another camera's lens,
but behind pale skin, cast in sunlight,
in a kodak flash, beyond the freckled flesh
wrapping your bones, there's still something young,
there's still something burning in you,
curling the tips of my feathered wings.

Before a flowered urn, you could ask me just to watch
from afar, you could ask me to see and sing and write along,
and ride along on the trick horse parade,
but never have asked me to explain -
But it's these new photos, these new memories,
binding us.
The new fruits of our lives that
we can harvest in the dark, and talk
just to the stars, waiting for their burning light
to untie us,
to unite us,
but first untie me for now,
 and let me in.
If not unraveled here, if not here,
just where do we belong?

Not in another's arms, not frozen in another night alone,
chasing the silver serpent in the crest of a tsunami,
seeking my reflection in the weathered waves,
seeking my reflection in the glass of your bedroom window,
and I'm tap, tap , tapping at the glass, shaking icicles loose,
shaking in my boots, and it's nothing but a little expression,
just please, open these windows and these doors

girl let me, let me, come on,
before it gets too cold, and all
the words on the air will just freeze and break.
Open all the doors and the windows, let this natural daylight,
nightlight,starlight in
and - Let me touch,
and trust
that I'll touch too much,
that I'll hold on too hard
wearing out all the bones in our arms,
     15 years apart
     and in one moment,
     lost in you,
and girl, believe me - I've had you on my mind,
and at times we floated too close for comfort,
and I watched you and your and friends ride on by,
and I watched all my chances come and go,
and I'd daydream, skip stones across silent ponds,
and I'd always catch my reflection,
and get the impression you were in it somewhere too.
and it's nothing but a little expression
but
I promise I won't live this life out
and miss another chance to hold you.

i